Joy

Back in 2007 I’d just finished my degree in History and Theory of Art, and was taking my first shaky steps into the world of work. 

My tutor suggested that I should intern for a year to gain experience before applying for entry level positions. This wasn’t possible as I had responsibilities - a house, bills, a partner and bonus son - and had been working full-time hours in a pub throughout my course just to stay afloat. I couldn’t take unpaid work, even if it was the best thing to do for my career. 

My first post-uni paid job was with a company my tutor had recommended for an internship: Strange Cargo, an arts company based in nearby Folkestone. I remember being awestruck by the group of amazing, talented people that formed the tight knit team. I’d never met people like this - and I was overjoyed to be working with such inspiring people! 

My role was assistant to the seamstress, the amazing Anna. I’d create poppies out of silk, oyster shells out of calico, and appliqué letters onto an apron for a Tracey Emin ‘Big Head’ that was to accompany the Margate ‘giant’. I’d march in Liverpool’s Capital of Culture carnival, and get stuck in the sand trying to get a closer look at Antony Gormley’s sculptures. It was the most fun job, with the most wonderful people.

I can still hear the dance group in the adjoining room at Whitstable Castle singing  to ‘Fame!’ as Anna and I would reply “I want to live forever, I want to learn how to fly! Remember, remember, remember!”

I remember the complete and utter satisfaction of using an overlocker for the first time. I remember rediscovering early memories of creating clothes for my Sylvanian Families bear, and the pure joy that occurred from allowing natural creativity to just… flow. 

Fast forward a few years to my wedding day - I’d left Strange Cargo to take up a more traditional 9-5 role in an office, filing and photocopying and making thick grainy coffee for the nicotine-stained Martin. There was no joy, but I needed the steady income to keep the numbers in my bank account above red. I remember working out a budget, and realised I was paid £987 per month and my expenses were £986. It was that tight. So receiving £987 every 28th of the month was a necessity, and joy just had to take a back seat.

I’d invited a few of my Strange Cargo friends along to the wedding reception and was so happy to see them again and have them share my happy day. I looked up to them more than they probably realised - they were strong, independent, creative and free - living the dream! 

My Office Boss came over to say hi and, though kind-hearted, she was a little socially awkward. As she greeted my creative friends she laughed “well she’s got a proper job now”. 

I was mortified. These people - these amazingly talented, genuine and caring people - had not deserved to be offended.

And these words stuck with me. 

Looking back now - many, many years later - I wish I’d told her that she could keep her ‘proper job’ and ran back to the ‘joy’ that I’d left behind. But: bills. 

Throughout the years despite the ‘proper job’ I’d managed to satisfy my creative bones by freelancing as a designer, creating cocktail menus, brochures, lead magnets, logos, websites, branding. Helping small businesses to present themselves professionally, it was a pleasure to see them shine. 

Now fast forward again, many years later, and I have another ‘proper job’, yes, but this time with the most incredible boss, in the most incredible small business, with the most incredible community, and the most incredible team. 

My most-incredible-boss is perhaps the most stylish woman you’ve ever met, rib-achingly funny and holds the wisdom of a thousand years. Part of our ‘proper job’ is to ensure we have a regular dose of joy in our lives. Yep. We have a huge plan on the wall with the whole year mapped out, and each team member has added their ‘things that bring me joy’ for each month. 

When she first came up with the idea I actually had a panic attack. I cried. My heart raced and I couldn’t catch my breath… Joy? EVERY month? How on Earth would I be able to find something that brought me joy EVERY month?! 

My life had been drained of all joy over the last 17 years. My only source of joy was my children. I had forgotten everything else. 

And that gut-churning realisation was enough to get me started.

So January came and I dutifully started an NLP course. Dedicating 30 minutes each evening to learning something I wanted to learn, for me, felt so naughty! 

Spark ignited. 

February came, and I spent time re-learning how to make origami cranes and crochet snuggly cardigans. 

Spark brightens. 

March arrived and I spent a luxurious afternoon with a close friend at the theatre, watching Six. The story of Henry VIII’s wives and how their story wasn’t just as ‘one of his wives’. They had hopes and dreams, and achievements, too. 

Spark rages. 

This wild spark, now roaring with years of reawakened energy, is now causing me to find joy everywhere I look - a clean and tidy office space, 1990s hip hop, bright colours, buttercups, new socks, Angel Delight, lavender scented fabric conditioner. 

The more joy I felt, the more the spark raged - and the more the spark raged, the more joy I was seeking. 

For weeks and weeks I channelled this roaring spark of joy every evening to put a name to the joyful, creative side hustle that had kept my ‘need for creativity’ ticking over since the giants and oyster shells and ‘Fame!’ all those years ago. Spurred on by the amazing support of my best friend, also creating her joy-filled business, the spark of joy flickered and danced and over time materialised as The Deal Design Co. - a place to focus on joy and creativity, earning money to rival a ‘proper job’ and do what I love to do, in the beautiful town that I’m lucky enough to call home. 

(Wrapped up in the colour that brought me joy as a teenager - a slightly offensive yellow! But that’s another story).

And if it wasn’t for the beautifully creative Scampi, Anna, Emily and Sam, nicotine-stained Martin and socially-awkward Office Boss, I’d never have learnt the importance of joy. 

But most of all, if the incredible woman that I’m lucky enough to work for hadn’t forced  me to look for joy, I fear I’d never have found it again. And I’m eternally grateful.

Here’s to joy - to The Deal Design Co., and to keeping sparks alive.